7 Tips To Homeschool Your Strong Willed Child
As you remember the tears, tantrums, and arguing of the homeschool day (from you child or yourself) you can admit that things need to change.
I want you to envision a different day. Think of the perfect homeschool day. What would it be like?
Your child hanging on your every word as you explain the math lesson, getting dewy eyed over the poem you are reading, and grabbing their pencil to eagerly write down the spelling list. Then dramatically reading the next chapter in the history book, jumping up to shout “No” when you tell them the school lessons are over?
Oh wait, wake up. I think you fell asleep and started dreaming…
Ok, so not quite that overboard, but probably a little close to that. It’s alright, I think we all go into homeschooling our child with rose colored glasses on.
Now think of what they would envision for their perfect day. They would love a “Yes” day where you can’t tell them “no” to anything.
Such as playing computer games, going out to lunch at a pizza place with game rooms, going to an amusement park or the beach, get an ice cream cone, go to the movie theater and a trampoline park, stop by a toy store, and then camp out at a motel with a pool.
Now you need to meet somewhere in the middle. You can work together to make a plan that will work.
Your strong-willed child needs to be approached differently. You can put those lessons in front of your child, put the pencil in their hand, but you can’t make them do the assignment…yeah, I know, I tried that also.
You need to get creative to get them to do the lessons. Amazing strong willed kids like to be in charge, so let them have a voice.
7 Tips to success with your strong willed child
1) Admit that the way you are doing things is not working or you would not have found this post.
The way I was doing things were not working either, or I would not have wrote this post.
It is so hard to admit this is your situation, especially to those Pinterest perfect homeschool moms.
Put your worry aside. I am definitely not that mom.
I have been in your place. Absolutely no shame, you are just at the beginning of a grand adventure.
2) Step back and think it through.
Knowing things need to change, stop the scheduled lessons you have been trying to get through.
Take a break and shake it up.
You could go to a park, explore on a nature walk, take a picnic lunch, just go somewhere that is neutral ground.
Spend time together mending bridges and breaking down walls.
3) Talk with your child about the way things are going.
Ask them their input of what they think is the problem or any ideas of what can be done differently.
This is to be talked about in a neutral discussion, not as if you are shaming them, it is just to gather information.
Have them write down things they would like to learn about, some things they are having a difficult time with, things they hate doing, and some things they wish they could do.
4) Come up with a plan together.
Go over their list together and let them know any of your ideas.
Have them rate the ideas in number order of what interests them the most.
Get out the calendar and plan out what needs to be done to get information on the subject and then how to explore that interest.
Let’s say your child wants to learn about space. Know how your child learns best and what they dislike. Maybe they learn best from movies or YouTube and do not want to read a book about it.
Have a time to look up available information on space, maybe a video clip on YouTube. You two can check out Pinterest on different ideas to learn the planets or the oreo cookie visual you could make together about the phases of the moon.
Plan a day to visit a planetarium. Maybe this leads them to getting a telescope and setting a time to look at the moon, take pictures, and record the moon phases along with learning the constellations .
5) Try it out and evaluate it together.
Let them be a part of their own educational journey.
Only don’t call it that in front of them!
It is just the different things they would like to know more about or new places to visit and explore!
After coming up with a plan, try it out, add or subtract from the plan.
Talk about what is working and what is not.
6) Welcome to the rabbit trails.
Let’s say that while you are learning about space you are outside observing the night sky you hear a noise.
Was that an owl? What are the animals that are out at night? Did you see that bat? Why are there bats? What are the good for?
Then your child eagerly looks up information on bats. Maybe the want to build a bat house.
While they are at it they build a bird feeder.
What birds are coming to the feeder, they want to identify them.
Welcome to all of the rabbit trails that are the result of your child eager to learn more.
7) Add something enjoyable to the schedule.
There are so many options, from little things to grand adventures!
You could play a game together before the school day, go on weekly nature walks and start a nature journal. Read poetry, look at paintings by the same artist to get a feel for their style, take an art class together, cook together, or try some new crafts.
Have a special adventure every month or so where you decide the subject, gather information, explore the topic, and end with a field trip to tie it all together.
Let’s say the subject is Little House on the Prarie. Learn about the author, read her books, watch a movie about Little House on the Prarie, and end by visiting one of the Laura Ingalls Wilder home sites.
Again, strong-willed kids love their input to be considered and to be in charge of things. So by working together they will take ownership of the plan.
Let them pick what to learn about in history.
Let them pick out their own book for reading.
My older son went from low reading comprehension in 3rd grade to to some high school reading level when he was able to pick out his own books for reading. He even read out of the dictionary because it was his choice.
These steps will enable you to go from trying to force your child to complete their lessons to them looking up information and learning after “school hours.” Your strong willed homeschool child with thrive on exploring learning adventures.